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  • Writer's pictureJ. Wilson

Serving Those Who Served Our Country

Reports show that veterans are twice as likely to die by suicide as civilians according to the Department of Veterans Affairs. This alarming statistic sadly translates to about 18 veterans dying by suicide every single day.

Empowering Outreach & Services is actively engaged In collaboration with other support services in our communities, we do our best to support veterans in need of help. Too many veterans are dealing with issues of homelessness and suicide. Too often however, we don't get to meet them until they've reached a point of crisis.

For confidential 24 hour Crisis Support contact the Veterans Crisis Line. They operate 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year. Call 800-273-8255 and press 1, chat online at VeteransCrisisLine.net/Chat or text to 838255.

We have the following story that illustrates what it can feel like for a veteran suffering with mental health issues, homelessness and potential treatment strategies.

Adjusting to Civilian Life After Deployment

After 5 years of service in the Navy, with one overseas deployment, this particular veteran seemed to adjust well to civilian life. He and his wife created a lifestyle that “checked off all the boxes”: full time work, house, property, children, camping and fun outings…but emotionally, he felt like he was suffocating.

The client and his wife talked past each other, minimized each other’s needs, and thought that going through the motions of marriage would be enough. The routines that could have been comforting instead felt monotonous. He carried on a secret affair, but even the excitement of something new couldn’t make him feel any better. The guilt he felt only suffocated him further.

He couldn't see a way out, without causing himself and the people he cared about significant pain. He woke up one morning and collapsed on the floor, thinking, “I can’t do this.”

A Moment of Crisis

This veteran drove himself to a bridge overpass and considered jumping off, but he just couldn’t end his life. After calls for help to family and local law enforcement, the client was secured on a 72-hour hold in a local psychiatric hospital. Then he was remitted into the hospital for another 2 weeks.

As the acute risk of danger to himself had passed, he was discharged to the care of a local psychiatrist. The psychiatrist prescribed medication, recommended outpatient individual and couples therapy to address the clear breakdowns in communication, and referred them to counselors within the Department of Veterans Affairs.

Treatment

Treatment helped this veteran to understand the emotions he was feeling and ways to label and express them- something that was not modeled for him by his family of origin and actively avoided during his time in the Navy.

“We did our work, drank a little on the weekend, and just lived life”.

This Veteran began to see that his attempts to hide from his emotions and run from the consequences of his decisions had backfired. He and his wife began a new paradigm in communication of needs and boundaries. Over time, they worked through infidelity and rebuilt connection.

The client began to understand the same amount of effort it took to hide could be the very tool to rebuild the joy and collaborative spirit in his marriage. As he began to see hope in his family, the desire to end his life diminished, and then halted completely. The affair was over and divorce is no longer on the table.

He created a wellness plan to help him clarify the aspects of life that allowed him and his family to thrive, and he began to see how he could join in on the joy of his family instead of having it be just a routine full of pain.

He and his wife still have a road to recovery ahead of them, but now, they can describe the gifts that they bring to the relationship that will keep them going: honesty, teamwork, fun, collaboration, communication, and setting boundaries.

Community Collaboration

To date, the success of this veteran was only possible because of the networking with other organizations that help to provide relief and support. This Veteran was lucky to have a home and a family but far too often that past and mental health issues can leave a person dealing with addictions and even homelessness. Our goal is to service all people before it becomes a crisis and to that point.

Talk to the veterans in your life. We need to normalize the conversation about PTSD, depression and veteran suicide. If we are going to improve, it needs to be out in the open. Know how to connect veterans to local services in your community so they can get the support they need.




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